Bon voyage Malaisie, bonjour Paris!

I’m quite glad that there are so many things to do here so I’m quite rarely bored, unless I stay at home the whole day. Few things I’m quite upset I didn’t do though like hunting down the cast of Gossip Girls when they were filming around the city, going to Champs-Élysées to experience the finals of the Tour de France, and uhm…. that’s all that I can think of right now! The pictures will tell you the rest of the story.

Rollerblading at Palais Royal.

We celebrated Catherine’s 23rd birthday at Pont des Arts and it was a day before Bastille Day so plenty of people were having picnics on the bridge. It started out quite sane but at the end of the night it became quite crazy because everybody on the bridge was extremely drunk. We had plenty of random people ‘joining’ our little party, taking pictures with us and all I remember was a lot of random flirting going on. French guys are certainly very curious when they see a bunch of Asian girls together.

The next day was Bastille Day (the French national day). I didn’t bother going to watch the parade because it was raining so I opted to watch it on our tiny little TV set and laughed at everybody caught out in the rain! It looked kinda boring anyway so going to watch the fireworks at night was a much better option.

For some reason, these photos make it seem even more amazing then it actually was!

On a random note, I got very hungry the next day and made this:

Yum, yum, yum.

Sam visited for a few days and I took him around Paris to see the sights. Seriously, I can be a very good tour guide right now. My only complaint is that my feet are starting to get sore with so much walking in just one month!

There was one really cliché thing that I’ve always wanted to do, which was to have a picnic underneath the Eiffel Tour so this was the perfect opportunity! There’s something about it that’s incredibly charming but doing it once is enough, and of course the food also has to be super French like baguettes, wine, cheese, saucisson, cherries, etc etc. It’s good now but I’m already starting to get sick of it!

Lots and lots of people at Champ de Mars.

From sunset at 9 pm to the light show at 11 pm. So beautiful.

I’ve been trying to meet more new people in Paris recently. It’s quite tiring when I have to go out almost everyday but I guess that’s better than staying home all day. However, I received a bunch of flowers yesterday which was unusual but also quite sweet. I’m not much of a flower person so this is a very, very rare occurrence I can assure you of that, but I guess it’s the thought that counts!

I wonder how long this will survive?

Living with the family again is an interesting experience. You miss them so much when you’re away, but once you live with them you can’t seem to get away fast enough! It’s a good thing I still have to travel in and out of the city this month to make it a little more bearable. Ah, how I miss my spacious, gorgeous, minimalist studio apartment. We seem to have a LOT of things at my parents’ place that I half-joked to my mother saying that my old room feels like a storage area now.

It’s quite funny how my last two months in Malaysia seems to be the busiest for my work and social calendar. Why is everybody asking for me only when I’m about to leave the country? I had months of moping around the house watching TV for countless days and constantly just feeding myself, attributing to some very obvious weight gain. Gloom.

Anyway, I shouldn’t complain too much. I’m sure this weight will start shedding off once I’m on the starving artist’s diet when I’m in Paris very soon.

I’m very excited and a little nervous about the big move. On one hand, I’d be living in the city that I feel so at home in even with all the annoying and frustrating quirks about it. On another hand, I’d have to start all over again.

It hasn’t been that long since I moved to Kuala Lumpur exactly one year ago, with just the hope of making a name for myself in the fashion industry and getting out of my small hometown. I did not have anybody worth knowing and had to support myself by waiting on tables for a few months (which some people might find as a surprise).

Eventually I got pretty lucky and landed myself a pretty big job for the Malaysia International Fashion Week. Because of that, I was able to meet a lot of people who I ended up working with even months after.

I’m nervous because I don’t think I will get lucky so quickly in Paris. I don’t have the contacts, familiarity, understanding and very little friends. Many people have shown their support saying that they know I will do well in Paris which is great, but the question is how much time should I anticipate it for? I don’t want to put my hopes of making something out of nothing in an unrealistic amount of time and feel like such a failure if I don’t succeed.

I didn’t expect this post to go on for so long but what I mean to say is I wish for a miracle and hope that I don’t fall flat on my face in Paris. I need to make something out of nothing in a foreign country, foreign language and foreign culture. It’s a huge risk to take but what is life without risk, right?

If any of you have words of advice, do share them with me!

What did I want to post about again? This is getting pointless.

I can’t wait to leave KL. O.M.G. I need to get out of here fast, ASAP! Garrrghhhhh!!!!

Anyway I’ve been back in Malaysia since Monday and to be honest I felt a little sad coming home. It just didn’t feel… right. I think I may have found the place for me to settle for the next few years being but fingers crossed that it will actually happen. I have big BIG plans for this year. The question now is if it’s worth sacrificing everything I have here to be somewhere I don’t have anything and to start all over just because I will be happier there? I have just a few months left to figure it out.

I think way too much at 6 am. Out.

Lamphead the silent killer.

Lamphead the failed rocker.

The polaroids begin.

My ‘worshipers’. No shit, bitches.

Trademark poser pose, always necessary.

Polaroid memories are my birthday tradition.

The best part of the night, our music video you definitely MUST watch.

Michele loves Nadia, Ray, Jon & Ash! <3<3<3

Good times, good times.

?

Are you going to let go? Can you really?

First impressions from the front door.

My lovely new clean kitchen and loving my bar stool (necessary to satisfy my ‘bar habits’).

Tiny dining space for two. I absolutely adore that little plant and floral arrangement, I need more of it (hint hint).

Living area and workspace, featuring a glossy new 24″ iMac and the amazing Alesis M1 monitor speakers.

Last but not least and definitely my favourite, The Room.  Also, awesome night view outside my window.

I did have some assistance from dear mother with moving in and shopping for all my items so that was a big help. Thank you mother (yes, she does read my blog). I still have this huge space at the start of the apartment that I need to fill up with furnishing. It’s so empty that my voice echoes in that area. I really like the fact that I have so much space which I can also easily convert into my shooting areas. Apparently my bathroom is so big it can fit a whole family into the shower area, not that I tried of course.

I would love to have people come over for some company since it can get rather boring staying in the apartment by myself all the time. You are also welcome to bring the following as housewarming gifts hehehehe:

• Flower arrangements or shrubs

• Rugs and placemats

• Wine and champagne glasses

• Art pieces or large canvas prints

• Candles and holders

• Throw pillows

• Let’s not forget the ‘Hard Stuff’ (liquids).

Come visit soon because I also have an amazing poolside <3 <3 <3

Hello Kuala Lumpur, my base for the next year and until then who knows what?

More later, am getting lazy updating this blog again. Noooooo.

Also, big thanks to everyone who showed their concern and opinions over the issue. XX

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Original Post: This is appalling. I’ve just found out that an image I took in 2007 is being used to advertise the ‘Shenanigans 2009 Most Eligible Bachelor Contest’ in Breeze magazine! Observe:

Above: The original image taken of Jeffrey Tanggau sometime in 2007.

Above: The page used to advertise Shenanigans and the image concerned.

To make matters worse, they’ve even re-edited the photo and (gasp) enlarged Jeffrey’s eyes! Major ouch to all parties involved. I’m not sure if anybody (and by anybody I mean the editor, designer, Shenanigans or Jeffrey) is aware that the imaged used for the advertisement is now considered ‘stolen‘.

I also wonder if re-editing the image is their way to differentiate it from the original image but it can obviously be seen that it is the same photo.

I’ve just sent out an email to everybody who might be involved and I’m waiting to receive a proper reply. This will not go down without a proper settlement (to those who aren’t in the know or aren’t from Kota Kinabalu, Shenanigans is a popular pub in Hyatt Hotel). Hell, it’s plagiarism for goodness’ sake!

The issue that is really pissing me off is that the image is being used for profit making without my approval or acknowledgement. Rightfully they have to buy the use of the image or at least get my permission to print it.

I’ve always heard of people complaining about their images being stolen and used for advertising or profit making situations but never did I imagine it happening to me.

I mean, everybody knows that plagiarism is wrong. And what’s worse, to plagiarise the work of a starving artist. That really takes the cake.

Epic.

A sudden realisation brought a wash of thoughts into my mind. It mocks me.

“You are not good enough, talented enough, smart enough, rich enough, friendly enough, caring enough and desirable enough.

You are unoriginal, lazy, lonely, emotional, broke, selfish and unwanted.

What have you done to yourself?

What have you become?”

I know some people reading this may think “God, don’t be such a drama queen. You’re overreacting.” Haven’t you had a time when suddenly, you start to doubt everything about yourself? Everything you’ve ever done?

Sometimes I feel as if I were to disappear from the face of this earth (more realistically, never come online, throw my phone away and lock myself in my room) nobody would even realise. I may cynical but I know it.

The question now is, what do I do about it? What do I do about the problems that are bothering me? How do I become better, more talented, richer, smarter, more original, friendlier, more desirable? How? HOW? I feel like I’m stuck between the second third and fourth level of Maslow’s hierarchy, not being able to reach the fifth and final level.

Maybe my period is coming soon. ROAR.